Wednesday, September 2, 2009

A (sort-of) rant

I took the twins to the doctor for their well-checkup yesterday. And can I just say that I left that office feeling pretty good?

They answered all of her questions with a yes! Well, all except the question about wearing a helmet while riding a bike. But really, does anyone do that?

Questions like,
Do you ALWAYS wear your seat belt?
Can you write your name in cursive?
Do you have chores?
Do you eat good? (what an odd question)
and the biggie! Can you tell time on a non-digital clock?

I felt like a successful parent.

I know, I know. The answers to those questions don't make a successful parent. But yesterday? After the kind of morning I had had with a couple of the kids. I needed them to get all those answers correct. I needed some affirmation.

And then I realized that my confidence in parenting doesn't come from an outside source. My confidence comes from the Lord. Only. I don't need to seek worldly approval of my parenting skills. I need to seek God's approval of my parenting skills. God is my authority.

I tend to get all caught up in what other people think of me. I can't tell you how many times over the past few days I have said " I feel personally rejected".

You see, I was part of a small team of women that organized a women's conference for our area. We had a great time meeting and planning and getting to know one another. And then it came time for registration and I couldn't get hardly anyone I knew to come. The other women had scads of women coming, but not me.

I felt rejected.

I shouldn't have. (Although as I write this I still feel that way.) But I did/do.

But, you know what?

It really doesn't matter. Maybe Saturdays are precious to those people. Maybe it was someones birthday. Maybe being around a bunch of women isn't their thing. Maybe it wasn't ME they were saying no to.

I'm a slow learner. I'm too old to be learning this lesson. I should have learned it YEARS ago. But I didn't. I'm still learning it each time it happens.

My confidence is in the Lord. My courage comes from the Lord. My strength comes from the Lord. Not man. Not woman. The Lord.

Hallelujah and Amen!

3 comments:

Kelley said...

I have had a week this week and it is just Wed. I don't know why I care what people think either sometimes. God is the authority. I am glad you wrote this today. I have been feeling rejected too. I am not sure if the word for me is rejected. Maybe just feeling down. I am feeling a lot better having read your post.

Tara said...

I find myself feeling the same way sometimes. It's nice to be reminded that the only opinion that matters is God's opinion. Sorry you had to go through that, but thanks for the reminder:)

Lisa @ The Preacher's Wife said...

I know this one all too well, Julie.

Here's a verse the Lord has engraved in my brain for such times when I'm condemning myself because I feel rejected or uncommended in some way:

2 Corinthians 10:17

"Let the one who boasts boast in the Lord. For it is not those who commend themselves who are approved but the one the Lord commends."

Just ask yourself: Was I faithful in the tast I was given? Did I do it to the best of my ability? Even if I could have done better, was the intent and motivation of my heart pure?

If you can say yes to one or all of the above, well then girlfriend, the Lord is singing over your effort and if He is for us, who is against us?

And even with all that, I still wrestle with my flesh so know that it isn't easy but the Lord will console you.. He does me every time..:)

Don't you appreciate this book I 've just written in your comments?? Geesh.

Now to go beat myself up a bit..lol